Moving back "home"

I moved out of Columbia, South Carolina in November of 2004 and I really thought that I didn't want to ever go back again. I grew up there my entire life and when I was ready to go that was going to be it. I thought once I moved away I would make sure that never happened. But its so funny how sometimes when you think you know what your going to do in life God shows you there is another plan in the works. You don't always understand when or why but you just have to put your faith in that God has a bigger plan for us and sees the "bigger picture".


So, with that being said through a lot of prayer, thought & consideration John & I have decided to move back home @ the end of the month..about a week left now...eek! (Guess I better start to packing, again!)

While we don't really want to be back in South Carolina we know that this is the best thing for our family for a little while. We will save much money on rent, we can save up a little, finally be A LOT closer to the family, and continue to look for jobs in North Carolina where we ultimately want to be again. I know its only temporary also which is helping me stay somewhat sane. ;)

I am working hard to really stay positive through this transition(as hard as this is for us) and know that it really will be SO great to be around the family again & have some our dear friends closer again!!

GIRLS NIGHTS OUT... here we come! ;)

Before I was a mom:

I can't take the credit of writing this cute little poem but it is so true. There is no greatest joy that I have in my life than the life of being a mama! Even though some days I am so exhausted from the day to day routine of it all but I truly love every single minute of it! Hearing that sweet girl tell me she loves me and feeling her sweet little touch truly makes it all worthwhile.






Before I was a Mom
I made and ate hot meals.
I had unstained clothing.
I had quiet conversations on the phone.

Before I was a Mom
I slept as late as I wanted
And never worried about how late
I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.

Before I was a Mom,
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys
or forgot words to lullabies.

Before I was a Mom,
I didn't worry whether or not my
plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never been pooped on,
Spit up on,
Chewed on,
Peed on,
Or pinched by tiny fingers.

Before I was a Mom,
I had complete control of myself;
My thoughts,
My body,
And my mind.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held down a screaming child
so that doctors could do tests or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't
want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces
when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew something so small could affect my
life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of having my
heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel
to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a
Mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small
could make me feel so important.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never gotten up in the middle of
the night every ten minutes to make
sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
The joy,
The love,
The heartache,
The wonderfulness,
Or the satisfaction of being a Mom.

I didn't know I was capable of feeling so
much before I was a Mom.

Some of the best things in life..

These are a few of my favorite things:


•Hearing Gabriela's sweet little laugh

•Laying out on the beach feeling the warm sun & the breeze on my face

• Kissing my sweet hubby.

• Catching up with old friends.

•Laughing until my stomach hurts.

• Reminiscing old times. Looking at old pictures. Listening to "old" music.

• Girls Night Outs with some of my favorite people. (Looking forward to some more in a few weeks!) ;)

• Hearing Gabriela say, " I Love You Mama"

• Having a wonderful conversation with John that reminds me again of why I fell in love with him and feeling even more connected.

• Going to church & come out feeling refreshed and renewed after hearing God's Word.

• Skyping with my family and friends that are TOO far away.

• Hearing birds chirping and reminding me of my amazing step father.

• Taking a nap while its raining and thundering out.

• Having wonderful dreams that wake you up smiling.

Some of the best things don't cost a penny, don't take much time, and usually I don't think twice about them.. But they are some of the best things in life because they remind me of how incredible my life really is. These are some of the things that bring the biggest smile to my face and makes my life a life worth living for. ♥

Until next time....

•dreams•

"Dreams are today's answers to tomorrow's questions. " ~Edgar Cayce




Last night I had an incredibly powerful dream. It felt so real as if I was actually "in" it. I felt such strong emotions during it and it felt so incredible to get the things I needed to say off my chest. Dreams have a strong way about them and can be so truly amazing (when I can actually remember them) :)


Stephanie (my best friend for the past 10 years) and I were talking. Our relationship has been somewhat estranged since she started dating her last boyfriend. Even though we talk here and there its not anywhere like it used to be. Maybe its because of her or maybe its because he doesn't like her talking to me. Who knows. Well anyways, we were talking about how hurtful it can be when our significant other says mean things during an argument and how it makes us feel. Sometimes things can get so heated she would say that it would make her feel "less of a person". How she would feel so bad about herself because of what he would say. She didn't know what she was living for. Why she was even living or what her purpose in life was. This made me so sad to hear. She is such a beautiful person. Anyone that meets her instantly loves her because of how kind she is, how funny she can be, how big her heart is and how cute that southern draw she has is :) I have never quite had a friendship like I have had with her. I told her that I have on occasion felt the same way. I have felt so low. So sad. So full of despair. These times are few and far between for me now but we all have our days that feel like that. Its life. I told her that when I did feel this way and couldn't understand how to possibly fix it I would hear and feel something that would change my outlook quite immediately. That would be to hear Gabriela's sweet voice telling me that "I love you mama" . I would feel her touch. What an amazing blessing that is. The best medicine I could of ever been prescribed. She is the meaning to life. She is what I live for. She is what life is ALL about.

I know this was just a dream but it felt so powerful to share because its true. When life gets tough I know that God has blessed me with more than I could ever imagined in my life. So instead of focusing on the things in my life that I DON'T have(which can be so easy to do) ... I decide to look at all the things I DO have. God has blessed me with so many blessings so far in my life and the best one is that girl that can ALWAYS manage to put a smile on my face and warm my heart just a little more.Its hard some days to remember what life was like before she came along. But since she has life has had more meaning, more joy, more laughter. Through it all.. the good and bad.. Life is so amazing.

Sisters.

" Our roots say we're sisters, our hearts say we're friends. "

I have two of the most amazing sisters. They are always there for me. They are as real as it comes. They support me when I'm right OR wrong and love me all the same(how lucky am I??) They are some of the best friends that any one could ever ask for. They know everything I've been through and are willing to deal with more. Growing up people used to tell me that when we got older that we would all be the best of friends. I couldn't help but almost laugh in their face when I would hear it. MY SISTERS? MY best friends?

Pssh. Little did I know... ;)

Through the years though that statement has become so true. I value my sisters in my life beyond words. They are some of the most important people I have in my life. I am so thankful that God not only gave me ONE incredible sister but TWO. I can relate so much to each one in different ways and I value each relationship with them beyond measure.

I pray we always have the relationship that we do now, watch it to continue to grow and see where it takes us. And I really hope that one day I can give Gabriela the same gift God blessed my parents with. Another daughter. So that Gabriela can feel what its like to have that amazing bond.

There is truly no one better than a sister. I love you sessters, ALWAYS have & I promise I ALWAYS will!!